Things to Say No too
It’s easy to forget how much control we have over our lives. We get so caught up in our own circumstances within our daily routine that we can loose focus and end up complicating things without even realizing it. As a personal venting sponge to most of my friends and family, I’m able to see a common theme of where they went wrong, and what the simple solutions are to fix all their problems. There are things you have to say no too, and boundaries you have to set for yourself in order to live your best life.
1. The Comparing
That little fire of envy sparks almost every time we see someone else have something we don’t, and desperately want. It’s almost immediate reaction to think the grass is greener on the other side. But, that impulsive feeling ends today because you’re going to replace it with another. Practice giving someone a compliment once you get the feeling of jealously, or just simply send them blessings their way. Understand that everyone’s path is their own path! You are not in competition with anyone because your life story is written completely differently. And, from your personality to your own individual experiences, you are completely unique. Comparing yourself to others is a waste of time, and holds no substance when working towards your goals and living out your best life. Trust the process and learn to love the journey.
2. The Compromising
My mother always told me you’ll never be happy with yourself if you’re compromising your core values. They define who we are and how we decide what’s right versus wrong. Sometimes
we feel we have to compromise that, usually through a job or within a personal relationship. Spend time understanding what you strongly believe in, and what you feel passionately about. In order to live your best life, you have to be satisfied that you aren’t compromising the things that make you who you are, for something or someone else.
3. The Complacency
No one should feel stuck. It’s in our nature, and abundantly healthy to continue seeking growth. Not to mention, society encourages it. There’s a common quote I’m sure you’ve seen on at least one bumper sticker, “Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.” American culture is all about growth, thinking outside the box, and getting outside of your comfort zone. But no matter what anyone tells you to do with your time, your first priority should be feeling a sense of peace and harmony within your everyday life. Most of our lifestyles happen to fall into a routine. From going to work to staying fit, socializing, taking care of your kid, pet, plant, and this list goes on. Even when going through tough times, avoid complacency by maintaining a balanced lifestyle.
4. The Drama
Stay clear of negative people, with nothing to give but negative thoughts and emotions. But, sometimes we can’t avoid these people. It could be a family member, coworker, or a roommate. My advice is to limit the time you spend with them. Send them love and converse with them on a short term basis, but that’s all. Your time is valuable and needs to spent around positivity. Negative energy spreads and only interferes with your happiness, growth, and your overall ora you give to the world. If push comes to shove and you’re comforted by that negative person you’ve been recently making boundaries with, you can let them know in a mature fashion. You’re not being a bad person by taking care of you. If they really care about you, they will understand and only want to change for the better to be closer to you.
5. The People Pleasing
Self care isn’t just about taking care of your body. It’s not just about eating right, working out, and making sure you have on enough SPF. It’s also about how much time and energy we give out to others. Overcommitting and people pleasing is a huge problem for some of you! There is a limit to how much of you, you can use. And, for you single parents out there, or insane mothers of six, I’m talking to you too. In this upcoming year, set aside at least 30 minutes of alone time to yourself. This is possible for anyone, and almost necessary for self care and living your best life. Overcommitting ourselves only overwhelms us, and in conclusion, only stresses us out. In order to give our best selves to others, we need to be our best selves, for ourselves.